Thursday, May 23, 2013

Home

As promised a few weeks ago, I'm finally writing my post on what I've learned about "home" this year.  While travelling to Indiana to visit Scott, I was feeling a lot of things.  I was obviously excited to be seeing him and celebrating his birthday with him, but I was a little nervous, too.  Next April I'm marrying Scott, and with that comes a lot of new things.  I'll be taking on a new last name (goodbye, dear Italian roots! Never again will I have to explain to someone how to spell or pronounce Poveromo.  It's both exciting and incredibly sad, but it's a necessary change :)), forfeiting some of my independence and introvertedness (I've decided this can be a word for today.  Just let it happen for me), and moving to a new city.  I'm not sure I've told everyone that I'll be moving, but with Scott being in dental school, it's sort of necessary unless we do a long-distance marriage (much appreciation for those who do that now... but after 7 years of dating long distance, this is not negotiable for me).

I think we all have a different idea of what home is to us.  And I think that definition and the picture we have in our mind of "home" changes over time.  Home to me has always been the smell of sunscreen as I sit in my beach chair with a good book in hand at Wrightsville Beach, a dog's face in the window as I pull into the driveway, the smell of my mom making marinara sauce on Sundays, my brother and sister sitting in the living room joking around about something ridiculous, coffee at Port City Java with my dad, and that "home" smell when I walk into my house.  No matter how many houses we've lived in, home always smells like home.  And feels like home.  So it's no wonder that I'm learning how home can be a feeling you take with you and not just a geographical location.

Home is not your house.  It's what's in the house and who's in the house.  It's the "small joys" that I always refer to that make up a home.  I took a class my sophomore year of college at Carolina called "Habitat and Humanity."  It was an anthropology class that I was taking only to satisfy some liberal arts requirements for UNC, and though the professor was a little dry, it was a very interesting class.  On the first day, the professor said to us (in a very monotone, flat voice), "In this class, we will learn about buildings.  Most of us spend all of our lives in buildings.  You were born in a building, and you will probably die in a building."  I found the statement to be quite odd, though true.  But the thing is, our lives aren't defined by those buildings.  We live our lives within them, but they aren't "home" unless you and the people around you make the building a home.  Many people find "home" far outside of a building.

So my definition of home is changing.  It's still those comforts that I find in Wilmington, North Carolina, but it's also stretching over hundreds of miles to encompass what I feel in Indianapolis as well.  Being with Scott feels like home to me.  After years of dating long distance, I get this feeling when I'm finally with him that is hard to describe, but it's something I feel no matter where I see him.  In his city, my city, our hometown, whilst travelling elsewhere, it's there.  And it's the very same feeling I get when I pass exit 420 on I-40 and see the first signs of Wilmington life.  It's the same feeling I get when I see a dog (or puppy) in the window waiting for me at home, or when I walk in and smell the air freshener in my mom's house.  It's that home feeling.

Scott and I went apartment hunting while I was visiting him in Indiana, and we found what will be our first home together when we get married (and my home for a little while before we are married).  It's a one bedroom apartment in downtown Indianapolis (more on the outskirts of downtown) with bay windows and all the potential to house the comforts of home that I've always cherished.  Though my Wilmington home will always hold that feeling of home to me, I'm beginning to see how Indy can have that for me, too.  And I'm seeing how, especially with Scott by my side and the Lord watching over us, this new place will soon be able to be home to me.  It'll be the first time I call somewhere away from Wilmington my home.  Chapel Hill and Durham continue to be "school" to me even though I'm not in school.  My grandmother picked on me last Christmas because I kept talking about "driving back to school."  It has always felt like a temporary place to me and though it has elements of home, it's never been my settling place.

So here's to new adventures over the next year and to growing some roots in Indiana.   North Carolina will always be home, and we're excited to one day return to NC after a few years of adventuring together.  The song "Wagon Wheel" will always make me think of my first home, but I'm excited to make memories in the new one as well.  Home, to me, then, is a feeling, and not a place.

Though cheesy as it may be, the quote "home is where the heart is" seems to ring true in my life.  And my heart is torn between two places, so it's no wonder that I'm going to find home in two different places next year.

On that note, I'll end.  This has been on my mind for a few weeks now and I'm so glad to finally be able to express what I've been thinking about and mulling over regarding my future home and whether or not it can feel like current home.  And speaking of the future home.. here are some pics I took while in Indy to give you a sneak peek of where we'll live.  :) I'm quite excited about this place.




Grace & peace, sweet friends.  I hope you can identify with this and know where your "home" is, even if it's not in a certain place.  



Monday, May 6, 2013

Malachi 3:10

"'Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house.  Test me in this,' says the Lord Almighty, 'and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it.'"

Some encouragement for today.  Learning to trust God with your finances should be easy, but for many of us it's not.  Remember that your money is not truly your's but God's. He has loaned it to you to steward well while you are on Earth.  Use it for good. Use it for His kingdom.  And give God what is His.

This verse is one I read often regarding tithing and giving charitably, and there's no denying that God uses what little we give for immeasurable good and countless blessing.


Sunday, May 5, 2013

Small Joys volume 5 (from the Midwest)

Hello beautiful friends!  I'm writing my small joys a couple of days late this week (though, maybe that's better than me not writing them at all for the past few months?) and from the great midwestern city of Indianapolis.  I'm supposed to be sleeping right now, but my body doesn't always know how to do what my brain tells it to.  There's a body nearby on the air mattress on the floor that appears motionless; I'm going to assume that means he's still sleeping.  Sometimes when I'm feeling really annoying I'll tumble off of my bed onto Scott's air mattress to startle him and wake him up, but today I'm taking the high road and writing a blog post instead.  There's something in the corner of the room right now (it's very dark in here) that looks like a dementor waiting to take my soul, so if this post is published posthumously, I hope it will be known that I was taken by the dementor in the corner of Scott's room.  And since dementors (this is a Harry Potter reference for those who think I'm making up words.  My SpellCheck thinks I am) remove every joyful thought you've ever had, let's not dwell on them any longer.  Onto the joys:

1. Indianapolis. That's my first joy right now. It's where I am currently and where the man I love is currently, and for a brief time, we're both in the same place at the same time.  Our engagement has been challenging so far, and I've struggled with finding joy in the midst of the chaos considering that my fiancĂ© has been so far away. I can't even explain to you how peaceful and joyful this experience is, of being in the same city as him and talking about our future together as if it's really happening now.  And it is.  In less than a year I'll have to move up here and live life with him as my husband.  I'm terrified to leave everything familiar but excited for a new adventure and what is to come for us.  It means letting go of my control-freak nature and trusting God with everything, from where we will live to my job, finding friends, finding a church home, and setting the foundations for a marriage that brings glory to our Maker.  So much anticipation, so much joy over the city of Indianapolis and the person I love who lives in it right now :)

Indy at night, the Capitol building. 


2. Running.  So, Scott and I ran the Indy 5K yesterday.  Or that's what we've decided to share with people.  After training separately for our half marathon, we were anxious but excited to run the Indy Mini Marathon yesterday.  Scott started having knee pain during the race, so somewhere between miles 3 and 4 we ended up stopping and walking back to his apartment.  We had already discussed that this half marathon was about being healthy and not about winning or how fast we could run it, and sometimes being healthy means listening to your body and stopping when it tells you to.  There will be other half marathons and opportunities to run, but I'm just happy we were able to at least run a 5K together.  It's been a while since we were running buddies, and it felt nice to run with him again.  We did both make it to 10 miles in our training so I know that we are capable of running the half, we'll just have to pick another time to do it!

Carb loading at Boca di Beppo


A little blurry, thanks to an unknown stranger. But pre-run

Our view waiting. We were in a late corral 
thanks to me (aiming for a 12 min mile.. haha)


3. Louisville.  Yes, another city that I don't live in listed as a small joy this week.  I was blessed to be able to ride from North Carolina to Louisville with my sweet friend Lindsay this week on my way to Indy.  She was taking a final for a class in NC and then was coming back to Louisville, so I got to taste a little bit of her life in Louisville during Derby week up there.  I enjoyed spending time with Lindsay and her fiancĂ©, seeing how cool Louisville is as a city, and taking part in some local culture.  I tried delicious BBQ while there, tasted the yummiest frozen drink I believe I have ever had (it was a swirl of frozen sangria and a frozen margarita. Oh yum), tried bourbon for the first time (apparently all bourbon comes from Kentucky... so when in Rome, right? It was actually pretty delicious), saw all of the Derby hats on their way to Churchills Downs (we did not make it there since it was Derby weekend but maybe when I live up this way next year I'll get a Derby hat of my own and visit Lindsay in Louisville), and shopped in some local stores (one of which provided me with my wedding jewelry!).  I really like Louisville and am anxious to return there for a visit again soon.  I'm so thankful that when I get married and move up here, one of my best friends will be only a 1.5 hour drive away.

(I just heard the body on the air mattress shift, and there were a couple of deep breaths before returning to his motionless state.  I think this at least confirms that he is alive. The dementor hasn't taken him yet).

4. Public Libraries.  Scott and I studied in the Indianapolis Public Library yesterday before heading to church, and it was just so fun.  We studied in a "cove" in the children's section of the library, which was actually quite cozy. I tested out all of the nifty chairs in the library and insisted that Scott document with photographs.  Seriously, coolest library ever.  It has an old part that reminds me of Wilson Library at Carolina, and the newer part is very high-tech and modern looking.  Here's some pics from the library outing.

Cove 3


Love some Ramona Quimby. These books
were my jam. 

Sleepy boy in the library. He has no idea I took this.

My egg chair. So cool.


The body on the air mattress is now moving quite a bit.  I should probably go be annoying and wake it up.  I've held out on being a mature adult and letting him sleep for long enough now.  With time only to document 4 small joys this week, you can be sure I'll be back with more post-travelling.  Love to you all and I hope you are finding joy in your week.

Grace & peace,
C.