Sunday, September 26, 2010

Slow Down

So I've hit a very interesting part of my training.. the part where I want to quit. Not because I don't like running or because it's hard, but because I have 0 energy at the end of each day at nursing school to come home and run 9 miles. I know that it's so silly and I really want to make it to the race, so I am praying that God will give me the physical and mental strength I need to finish what I started. It certainly will not be the end of the world if I do not get to run in this race, but it's been SUCH an incredible faith journey for me and I feel that to quit now would mean that I have no faith in myself or in the almighty Creator. It's no longer about if I believe in myself, but if I believe that God can carry me through the seemingly impossible tasks of life (to those who wonder: He not only can, but He will, faithfully).

I ask for prayers at this point in my training. I am discouraged beyond belief because I have not had the time to run, but I ask that you pray for God to give Scott and me the strength to finish strong, glorifying His Holy name every step of the way.

In Him,

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

8 Mile

Finally. 8.

I ran at home this past weekend with Trisha and Scott, and all I can say is running in Wilmington is a PIECE OF CAKE compared to my training in Chapel Hill!! I am SO thankful and so happy that I'm getting closer and closer to my goal each day, and in the process discovering the potential that God has for me. I always said that I couldn't run and that I would never be a runner, yet here I am a few months later and I am nothing short of a long distance runner :) God has knocked down the walls that I built around myself and has shown me that I am beyond anything that I believe I am. When I am found in Him, I can achieve anything in the entire world.

The past week has been rough thus far, and I have not been running since I came back from Labor Day weekend. I passed me first two major exams in nursing school though for the fall semester, so I am singing God's praises day and night for His deliverance. I now no longer question whether or not nursing was in God's plan for me. Nursing is written all over my heart and I just can not wait to pour out my life into my patients. I want my career to be such an incredible ministry and I want to be able to show God's love and grace to all I encounter in my nursing career.

Anyways, I tend to get on tangents when I'm really happy about my mileage. I'm also super happy because I found a wonderful Bible study tonight that I am really going to try to commit to and just pour my heart into over the next year.

In His arms of grace,

Friday, September 3, 2010

Burn out-- yet hope remains

So it's been almost a month since I have updated my blog.. how terrible! School started last week, new roommates have moved in, and my life has been so different from the simplicity of summer. While I was stressed with classes and working this summer, I still had plenty of time to run and take care of myself. Now that classes and clinicals are starting, I'm beginning to realize how little time I am going to have to train during this school year. Thankfully I have the most encouraging friends, as well as a training partner and at least half of the mileage under my belt.

Everyone has told me that if I can do at least half of the miles, I am good to go for the race. I have now successfully completed 7 miles nonstop without water breaks! I am appalled and so thankful that God has shown me what I am capable of when I just put my faith in Him. I took a break this week because I was so burnt out with running and so stressed with my crazy class schedule. The nursing school kind of owns all of my free time at the moment as we prepare for clinicals to start--they have front loaded us with a very hectic schedule so that we can learn a lot of the skills that we are going to need in our clinical experiences.

I will be running 8 miles with my favorite running partner again tomorrow-- Scott. I haven't seen him in well over a month and I am looking forward to getting to spend some time with him as well as training with him for a long run. Everyone keeps telling me that my training will really prepare me for the Wilmington race since Chapel Hill is so hilly. They say if I can run 7 miles in Chapel Hill, I could probably do 10 in Wilmington. I guess I'll be testing that theory out this weekend, weather permitting! Thankfully Hurricane Earl passed by Wilmington with no major damage left behind. I will be leaving tomorrow morning to spend a few short but therapeutic days at home; home always rejuvenates me and gives me my sense of self back again.

Anyways, sorry to make this such a long blog. I just needed some time to self-reflect and prepare myself for the last little bit of training that I have to get through. I have a feeling that my sense of relief will come when I hit 10 miles, as that is the mileage that most people train up to. I am actually training to 12 but I will feel an overwhelming sense of accomplishment and relief when I hit 10. God has strengthened me so much through this process and I feel that this journey of faith that I intended this training to be has whelmed me in the most wonderful way (and if you are wondering, the word "whelm" is certainly a word). I challenged myself with this seemingly impossible task and God swept me up and took me farther than I ever could have imagined. I say this all the time as I train, but really, if someone had told me a few months ago that I would be running 7 miles by the end of the summer, I would have laughed in their faces and told them that they must have been talking about someone else... for surely I, of all people, could never accomplish such a task.

God will surprise you and amaze you if you let Him in.

9 weeks to go,
See you at the finish my friends.